Not a lot to nosh on this week so we have some quick hitters. Although I will say it seems like the weeks we have the lowest expectations always result in some craziness.
1PM GAMES
Atlanta Falcons @ Minnesota Vikings (-5.5)
Kirk Cousins revenge game. Falcons trying to keep the season from slipping away. Is Kirk washed? Folks are calling for him to be benched for rookie Michael Penix.
Who scores? JUSTIN JEFFERSON OR WE RIOT. sneaky: Jalen Nailor.
Cleveland Browns @ Pittsburgh Steelers (-6.5)
The Browns haven’t won a regular season game at Pittsburgh since 2003. The Steelers are actually good, and Jamies Winston is actually fun. Should be a fun game. Go watch the AFC North Hard Knocks on HBO.
Who scores? Najee Harris. But also the Steelers defense.
Carolina Panthers @ Philadelphia Eagles (-13)
Bryce Young is finally looking good, but the Panthers have the worst run defense in the league and Saquon is on the trek to 2,000 rushing yards. Beatdown incoming.
Who scores? Saquon 2x. The Eagles will start purposefully feeding Saquon TDs that Jalen Hurts normally vultures as they build his case for MVP. sneaky: Xavier Legette.
Las Vegas Raiders @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-6.5)
Pirate duel.
Who scores? Sterling Shepard. Our guy Mike Evans is banged up and probably won’t make it through the game. sneaky: Sean Tucker.
New York Jets @ Miami Dolphins (-5.5)
Find me someone who cares. The Dolphins are technically alive for the Wild Card spot but need a lot to go right. The Jets are eliminated and their future is entirely up in the air.
Who scores? Jaylen Waddle. sneaky: Allen Lazard.
New Orleans Saints (-4.5) @ New York Giants
I mean… c’mon. This is just sad.
Who scores? Tyrone Tracy. sneaky: Drew Lock.
Jacksonville Jaguars @ Tennessee Titans (-3)
The Texans took Trevor Lawrence to the glue factory last week so we have Mac Jones vs. Will Levis! Pinch me.
Who scores? Brian Thomas Jr. sneaky: Chig Okonkwo.
4PM GAMES
Seattle Seahawks @ Arizona Cardinals (-2.5)
Massive playoff implications here as the NFC West is going to come down to the wire. I have no idea what to expect from these teams, as they seem to trend up and down for no discernable reason. Overtime vibes?
Who scores? DK Metcalf. sneaky: Kyler Murray.
Buffalo Bills (-3.5) @ Los Angeles Rams
With the Chiefs looking vulnerable week after week the Bills will want to keep winning to try and sneak the #1 seed and host the AFC playoffs in Orchard Park. What a scene that would be. The Rams are still in the fight in the NFC West but this is a tough ask to stop Josh Allen on his MVP arc.
Who scores? James Cook. sneaky: Davis Allen.
Chicago Bears @ San Francisco 49ers (-3.5)
A Bears win here would be the final dagger through the heart of the Niners. The Bears should come out fighting after their coach got fired. That debacle on Thanksgiving was a real doozy. The Niners don’t seem to know how to handle being a normal team, so we’ll see how they manage to close the season.
Who scores? Isaac Guerendo. Kyle Shanahan always plugs in a new RB and makes him look awesome. Sneaky: Kyle Juszczyk.
